Memory is an old friend. I welcome it with open arms, but sometimes I push it away and not let it come near.

Most of the time I choose to do the latter. Why? For a girl like me who never wants to forget, why? Why do I bother to make daily diary entries? Why do I choose to update my blog? Why do I spend hours finishing a [somewhat] useless scrapbook? If I don't want memories to come, why do I preserve them?

I don't want to forget. There are many days, many times, that are part of my memories that are close to my heart that I never want to forget: the day I laughed at this joke, the day I went to that place. The time I was depressed, the time I'd never felt so alive. And yet the ones I choose to remember are those that are not really important: dates.

Dates and memories are not really contrasts; they are part of each other, but they can exist without the other. Dates are important to me. I'm somewhat famous in my family for being able to remember such things, and I'd usually come up with "Do you remember that time when...it was on the 12th of May." or "Today last year we were at..." Being able to remember dates is kind of my special ability (which is why I love history), because they are my way of holding on to the past. Dates are just numbers. They are empty.

Memories are not. Memories are the ones that fill dates, that happen in between those numbers, every second, minute, and hour of the day. Memories are different. They do not need dates to exist. All you need to remember are the basics: that you were a kid, that this-and-that happened. No need for useless numbers.

Dates are harder to remember, but I choose them over memories. Why? Because memories are painful - I have never quite learned to let go properly, or to say goodbye, so I choose to let it pass without feeling anything. Days later I will remember where I was and what I was doing (but never what I went through), fall into the new routine, and not relive anything from that date. That's the main reason why I rarely miss anything. Saves me from somewhat unnecessary tears. Once it's gone, it's gone.

Quick. Easy. Painless.

There are some days memory comes to me and, no matter how much I resist, floods over me. Sometimes I take out mementos on impulse. I hate these days, memories are so uncontrollable! That and the feelings they bring: helplessness at not being able to change things, embarrassment or regret for what's been done, sadness for things past.

In short, pain.

Taking a walk down kioku no michi, as my sister calls it, is no hobby of mine. Not my favourite, but I can't help it sometimes. Today I read the blog of an old friend. I was so struck by the fact that two years had passed and so much had happened since then - stuff I tried not to feel - that I wrote my stat on Friendster: "have you ever thought about how far we've come? ang layo na kaya.. two years is a lot, especially in high school."

Hello, memory, old friend.

So today I just came home from Centre Island with my whole family plus Tita Baby (who came all the way from Cali), and Nicole and Monica.

Full story later 'cause my arms still hurt - don't ask. I'm going to write a three-part series about today's adventure, this being part three. What I mean by the title is, really, I saw something I didn't expect.

I do know that the FIFA U-20 is being held here in Canada, although I'm not very excited about it (at least not as much as I was at last year's World Cup). I was puzzled by the banners everywhere that proclaimed the event. I thought, oh, it's no big deal, maybe this is a smaller version, like undercards, you know. But there's always U-20 news in the dailies, and by reading I found out that U-20 is short for under twenty. So the players must be really young.

Wow, what a privilege, I'm in the same country as them! Although it's not as big as the actual FIFA World Cup, I'm still excited that it's being held in Canada. Not all matches are here in Toronto though. Some are in Montreal, Calgary, and Edmonton.

How big a chance was it that I would actually run into any of them? So imagine how surprised I was when, while we were waiting for our sundo in front of the Westin Harbour Castle downtown, a bus stopped by near where we were and a guy in soccer jersey, shorts, and cleats got out. I thought it was a tourist bus since there was no indication of it being any other. Then another guy dressed the same way came out. Then another, then another, then another, until the whole team got out. By then I was going "Wowowowowow".

All of them were wearing (if I remember correctly) red/maroon and blue. I checked the FIFA schedule a while ago and what luck, one of today's matches are in Toronto! I do not know if they are actually staying at the Westin or doing some publicity or what. I also do not know where they're from, 'cause I don't know what color jersey-which country they are. Based on the colors and today's schedule I'd say USA. But maybe they're not really part of the World Cup or anything. Still, though, wow.

Some people asked for autographs and then the coach came out of the bus and three little boys dressed in soccer shirts came up to him and said something, and then he patted one of them on the head. Appearently they knew him, or at least, that he was coming. I wish I could've asked for an autograph, but since I was not expecting this, I wasn't prepared. FIFA's site says today's USA-Uruguay match was 0:1, in favour (pardon my new spellings!) of Uruguay. I swear a minute ago it was 0:0. They sure update fast! Will check tomorrow's paper for final score. Click link above for details.

I kind of feel stupid.

Today before me and my sisters and Tito Raul went to the library, the neighbor, who was a white guy called 'The Boss', said "Somebody lose a shower cap?" I had no idea what he was talking about and so I said, "No". Then I realized he was holding a transparent plastic bag that did kind of look like a shower cap. I said "Oh, that's a big one," the same time he said "It was a joke".

Right.

Boy boy boy boy. It's one of those embarrassing moments I can't help but replay and cringe at. Oh, well. At least we'll probably be moving out next week. And he doesn't know who I am anyway.

So then we went to Port Union, which has a really small library with a big circular glass window at the side. The whole teens section consisted of exactly one shelf. With such limited choices I was forced to read the backs of books and it took me a really long time to decide. Finally I picked two chick lit ones and checked them out. I was stuck on whether or not to borrow The Princess Diaries VII, but I'd already read parts of it before.

I've actually just finished reading the first one, I Am the Wallpaper, which is a really good, funny book. I'd like to see it made into a movie. Floey Packer, the main character, was easy to relate to because she's experienced many mortifying moments, like me, though she did not make her own site to write of her own will, unlike me. Unfortunately for her, her diary is posted on the Internet by her cousins and suddenly she's not a wallpaper anymore. Being a nonwallpaper has consequences though - everyone knows everything about her, including her crush on her best friend. Recommended for the regular teen. It's a laugh-out-loud book with its own moments. According to a review it could be put alongside Louise Rennison and Paula Danziger, although the person who wrote it was a guy. Amazing.

In due time I will post the details on our trip to the Niagara and other stuff, but for now you're going to have to be contented with the pics (and no story) of Kuya Chris' wedding. It was a lot of fun. :)

THESE ARE ALL TAKEN FROM MY COUSIN'S FACEBOOK.

(Thanks Kuya Rommel XP)

The lady Santoses:
Mom, Auntie Tots, Auntie Cel, Tita Cisty, Tita Baby

Me, Nadine, Arielle, Nicole, Monica

Try this for size:
The entire groom's family. Well, almost.

The giveaways (fortune cookies)

Table for people over thirty:
The newlyweds and the "oldies".

Smile and say cheese:
The newlyweds and the groom's cousins (plus me and the dress I almost wish I didn't wear).

LOL:
Me and my sisters plus our goofy cousin Rommel (credits for the pics cuz).

Us again:
Monica, Arielle, Me, Nadine, Nicole.